sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I would ride that face into the sunset
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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