I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
