blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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