I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
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Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
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Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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