his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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