now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize