I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Your penis caused this!
Randomize