i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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