It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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