Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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