Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
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Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
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I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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