You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Mom said you looked used
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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