We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
No subtext here. People are naked.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
