i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
