but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Just invented taco cereal.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
