I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
