I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
