Have you finally orgasmed yet?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
