I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
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that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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