you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He managed to rip my nipple last night....