Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back

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  (617): but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back http://tfl.nu/ogq4
  Replies (30) Good night (1005) Bad night (2338)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.

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  (402): Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little. http://tfl.nu/w7gx
  Replies (31) Good night (1002) Bad night (3056)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth

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  (865): I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth http://tfl.nu/mdm2
  Replies (13) Good night (1564) Bad night (4369)
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  (530): View more from California

  the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.

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  (530): the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation. http://tfl.nu/fqo6
  Replies (11) Good night (3660) Bad night (926)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.

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  (419): I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem. http://tfl.nu/zh9s
  Replies (29) Good night (1257) Bad night (5940)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.

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  (513): They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real. http://tfl.nu/3nu3
  Replies (32) Good night (2389) Bad night (6570)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.

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  (832): I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella. http://tfl.nu/jiup
  Replies (35) Good night (3168) Bad night (1640)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.

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  (417): woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before. http://tfl.nu/td38
  Replies (4) Good night (1553) Bad night (574)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!

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  (910): I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT! http://tfl.nu/3dqj
  Replies (9) Good night (1644) Bad night (605)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I drink to make the karaoke go away.

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  (610): I drink to make the karaoke go away. http://tfl.nu/0jio
  Replies (6) Good night (917) Bad night (379)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.

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  (850): He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other. http://tfl.nu/l9kx
  Replies (9) Good night (469) Bad night (874)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number

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  (206): Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number http://tfl.nu/qktl
  Replies (2) Good night (467) Bad night (361)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going

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  (916): There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going http://tfl.nu/cnx7
  Replies (0) Good night (359) Bad night (443)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.

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  (727): Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high. http://tfl.nu/hvl4
  Replies (5) Good night (786) Bad night (256)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?

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  (720): Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night? http://tfl.nu/17tx
  Replies (0) Good night (357) Bad night (214)

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