And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
