I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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