thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
