problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
