Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize