pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
