Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
