I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
