i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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