Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.