More tranny stories later!
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
