Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
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Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
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You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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