We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
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