You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Barsexuality is the new black.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
