We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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