Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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