You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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