Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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