She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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