You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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