I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
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i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
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The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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