I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
