it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
