I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
