yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
