Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
