I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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