I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
