I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
