they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize