Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
