it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize